Before and after and the 5 things I’ve learned so far

5 Feb

There is a world of difference between my most recent post and this one. In a word: motherhood. There was before and this is the after.


There is really nothing that can prepare anyone for it. As an avid researcher, I’ve read and scoured scientific and anecdotal advices on how to deal with a newborn and in the end, I’m really just winging it.

The reading has served its purpose: to give me some sense of readiness, some confidence that indeed, I can handle this. But all those advices are thrown out the window when I’m faced with a screaming baby at 2 AM after several days (actually weeks – scratch that, it feels like months) of limited sleep. In all fairness, I’m blessed with a generally calm, healthy and beautiful baby. I have heard some horror stories and – knock on wood – I have been relatively unscathed so far. So what have I learned?

1. Sometimes, you really need to let them cry it out because there are limits to what you can do – feed, change, soothe. Two-way communication is not in the picture just yet.

2. The baby industry is full of products designed to make new parents like me want to buy every product because I’m constantly afraid that I’m doing something wrong and I would be depriving my baby’s developmental path otherwise.

3. Pacifiers don’t always work. Or maybe I bought the wrong one, see item #2.

4. Breastfeeding is hard. I absolutely don’t judge women who opt for formula feeding.

5. It’s okay to cry sometimes. Look, I love my sleep and just the idea that 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep is a cause for celebration brings tears to my eyes especially after months of bad sleep during the pregnancy.

On the positive side, there is no more heartburn from the pregnancy. It’s a different kind of “heart-burn”, if you know what I mean. Because a baby really is precious and fascinating and beautiful to behold.

Of course, this post is short. I have a baby to take care of.


3 Responses to “Before and after and the 5 things I’ve learned so far”

  1. Monica February 5, 2014 at 2:29 pm #

    I love this post!!!!
    A friend swears by giving them
    Formula at the 9:30/10pm feeding for a full 7 hours of sleep. ❤️Maybe u can try it!! See u soon xoxo

  2. Suzanne February 6, 2014 at 10:28 am #

    You are a great loving and caring Mom !!!
    You are right, we cannot learn everything from books and it is just normal to feel exhausted, you have been in a marathon for 30 days hardly sleeping, eating or relaxing ! Your body is just starting to recover plus all the mood swings related to hormonal imbalance since delivery.
    Try to take naps with her during the day, even if it is just for 15 minutes. Don’t feel guilty if laundry or dirty dishes piles up. In a few weeks, you and your baby will be stronger and life will begin to feel normal… again…
    We women… often think we have to be , there is no need to be, you are perfect just the way you are….
    Hugs xoxo

    • Suzanne February 6, 2014 at 10:30 am #

      We women… often think we have to be superwoman, there is no need to be, you are perfect just the way you are….
      Hugs xoxo

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