Sticks and stones

13 Apr

may break my bones, but words can hurt me more.

D tends to blurt his truths and promptly forget about them while I bury mine. Not forgotten, but neither is it fully remembered. Until that one unguarded moment when I bear the wrath of it – a sentiment unspoken becomes almost overwhelming when it bubbles forth, unchecked.

Once, a long time ago, I said something in pure anger over the phone. Silence. Then D catapults his own words at me, n times as damaging, ringing with finality. The pain for both of us felt like somebody ripped your skin off and that somebody happened to be the person you trust the most. In that instance, it doesn’t matter who said what. It hurt us both.  By disrespecting each other, we disrespect the love that we bear for one another.

So, I hold my silence and take care with it until I’m ready. Because I’m aware of the damage of words: carelessly thought and thrown, half formed and irrational, formed in anger and impatience. So, I take my time. The problem with that is, there are other things to do and sentiments get shelved like canned vegetables. One forgets about them until it’s time to clean the pantry.

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2 Responses to “Sticks and stones”

  1. Tita April 13, 2011 at 11:15 am #

    Difficult topic. I wish I could have the same control, or at least a little more than I have. Time is a good teacher, but even being in the same situation over and over again, every time is a new challenge. I still believe that LOVE is the only tool to keep us under control.

  2. Rivenrod April 15, 2011 at 8:20 am #

    Things happen eh! Odd that today should be the day that a report has been published which (in a nutshell) says that women do feel relationship pain more than men and take longer to get over it. You women also punish yourselves harder and longer.

    My guess is that most men are way too emotionally stupid to feel anything other than hunger, thirst, lust and indigestion.

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